Ten reasons why introverts fail at networking

What is holding you back from networking?

This is the last part of the networking for introvert series. There have been 2 articles from the experts, the first one is written by a financial adviser: Lim Chih Yang, and another is from a networking specialist: Jason Jacobsohn. Both admit that they are introverts by preference but both of them have made great steps into a career that involves a lot of networking. What does that mean? introverts have potential to be a strong person in networking. It’s not undoubtable, yet it has to be developed.

In the previous articles, there have been a lot of tips on making use of introverts’ strength in networking. Some to be mentioned are listening, focus on few people, analyze your way of networking, be authentic, and many others. Enough about the strength, now we need to get into the introverts’ weakness. You will not be able to change unless you understand what makes you weak on networking. Awareness is very important, especially not to fall into the same trap again and again.

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How to win extroverts in selling and networking

How can introverts better extroverts in networking and selling?

Here is another guest post on networking. This time, it comes from an expert in networking, Jason Jacobsohn, someone who is passionate about advocating for entrepreneurs through his business and community efforts.

Jason Jacobsohn is well known in the Chicago area as a “connector” and go-to person for entrepreneurs who want to grow and maintain their success. He is a seasoned relationship builder who enjoys sharing resources through his Website, Jacobsohn.com, newsletter, Network Your Way to Success, and blog, NetworkingInsight.com. Jason regularly speaks to groups about networking and is a featured columnist for MidwestBusiness.com, Personal Branding Magazine, and SoHo Magazine.

Five techniques to help an introvert to become an effective networker

When you think of a good networker, you probably think of someone who is outgoing and can easily talk to people. While this may be true for someone people, introverts can also be effective networkers. Below are five techniques that if implemented can give the introvert the confidence and mindset that building relationships is possible.

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The 5 simple things to appreciate your friend

You may have read it in my 12 tips to become a great friend, but I’m going to separate the post, first to respect Bruce who is holding the challenge. Second is not to distract my 12 tips with too many details.

Five simple things to appreciate your friends

It is the 5 little things challenges that Bruce from Brucism has started. I would like to share with you the 5 simple things that can help you appreciate your friends.

1. Listen: Friendship always listens. Similarly you need to give your ear while conversing with your friends. Listen what they like and dislike, listen to their question and opinion. Listen and do not judge too fast, and you will learn a lot from them.
2. Observe: Sometimes you just could not aware your friends’ strength just from the relationship you have with him/her. His/her strength may compliment others and not you. That’s why you need to observe his/her relationship with others. It is a way that you can see how he/she has really become a great friend.
3. Remember first: For a few friends that I have listed down there, I just started with the name first. I just somehow so thankful of this friend, and I want to put him/her in the list. The title/uniqueness comes later, amazingly in few minutes I can find a little thing that I can be thankful of from them. And from there I can describe much more.
4. Have a miracle from them: Albert Einstein said, “There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle.” Take the little things that your friend has done to you as a miracle, an encouragement is a miracle, an SMS or a simple gift is also a miracle. A pat in the back is a miracle, even how they call you brother/sister is also a miracle. That’s a secret of how you can find happiness in your daily life as well. Have a miracle everyday from your friend.
   
5. Believe: How do you bring the best in people? John Maxwell shared that “believing the best in people usually brings the best out of people.” Give your friends the benefit of the doubt. What does that mean? If you are doubting on the motive/reason behind their behavior, learn to give them the benefit of your doubt, means that try to always take it as they have the right motive behind. My manager, Dayal, taught me on the principle as well, he said… “Trust anyone until you have got a proof that you can’t trust them.” Give your friend your trust and you will bring the best out of them.

One last tip:

Do not let situation matter more than the relationship. Do not let disagreement to ruin the relationship. Remember the good time and you will appreciate your friend more.

Join my Group Writing Project: Reason-4-Smile - Our Friends, take the exercise to appreciate the friends in your life by giving them some title!

Cheers,
Robert

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12 ways you can become a great friend

Reason-4-Smile Group Writing Contest! I’m holding a group writing project on friendship, with free ads and Entrecard credits as the prizes. Please check the details below.

Do you have living saints in your life?

I have been tagged by Evan for a meme project, it’s called “The 10 Saints”. I was honored to get a title of patron saint of personal development from him. Yet, it comes with a price =), I was tagged to follow the same project, writing the 10 saints in my life as well.

The Saints (or the X-Men)…

I really enjoyed the process of finding the 10 saints, even to the point that I find 10 is not enough. There are 12 saints that I would like to share through this project. All of those 12 are friends that I know personally, the people around me who have touched my life in a special and unique way.

If you don’t like the word “saint”, you can think of them as your X-Men. I like watching X-Men, partly because I’m excited with the variety of talents and skills that each individual has, but somehow they can work together to complete their mission. Similarly, these 12 saints, 12 real friends in my life will share with you their unique talents, their 12 ways how you can become a special friend to someone. So… let’s get started!

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The introvert’s way to networking

Does introversion label you?

One thing I want to consult you. I’m an introvert like you. I found that sometimes it is really hard for me to make friend with others or we usually call it “networking”. Do you have any suggestion for me?

The question was asked by one of my readers, Harrison from Finandom.com. He blogs on pursuing financial freedom, and I believe that networking is extremely important to achieve them as well. Why does introvert think that making friends or “networking” sometimes difficult?

I have ever posted a short post on networking for introvert before. It was inspired by an article from BusinessPundit.com: Networking for introvert. I found the article when I google for some tips on networking that I am about to do at that time. The article has a good position on the search engine. The author and the former owner of the blog, Rob May, even admit that the article is the most popular article of all time on BusinessPundit.com. That really shows how introverts really struggle and need helps on networking.

Before I’m sharing my answers and insights on networking, I will share with you some tips from my friend cum financial advisor, Lim Chih-Yang.

In our last meeting, I shared about my blog to him. His reply surprised me, he confessed that he is also an introvert. It was hard to believe that. He is a full-time financial advisor and practically his work is all about networking, meeting up new people and building relationship with them. I believe that he must have challenge to decide on taking this career path, but the courage is inspiring. He is one of the persons that come to my mind when it talks about networking for introvert. He is an introvert and he is full-time networker. So… I’ll pass the mike keyboard to him… and here are the tips from him…

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Winning with People by John C. Maxwell

Do you need others to achieve your vision?

If your answer is NO, that means your vision is not big enough. If your answer is YES, that means you will need to have relationships with other people. Not only a common relationship, but a winning relationship. That is about how you can win with people.

I have just finished reading this book. If you are familiar with the previous book reviews I have shared, you will notice that they only have a short paragraph describing the book. From this book onwards, I am planning to give a more proper review of the book I read. Hopefully, it will help you decide whether you need to get the book and really benefit from them. As usual, I’m still providing the browse articles button, specifically to help you get the articles I have written, inspired from the book.

The book Winning with People consists of the five big questions below:

• The Readiness Question
• The Connection Question
• The Trust Question
• The Investment Question
• The Synergy Question

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Let’s have disagreement!

Do you embrace disagreement?

If two men on the same job agree all the time, then one is useless. If they disagree all the time, then both are useless.
~Darryl F. Zanuck

The quote above is taken from the book Winning with People by John C. Maxwell. The book is sharing on how to find agreement in the middle of disagreement but I’m not going to talk about agreement here. I’m interested to share more about the first part of the quote. It’s about disagreement, why it is important and how to handle them.

Inspiration

Last week I had a chat with one of my “apprentice”. I am leading a small bible study group, and I was asking one of them for some feedback on the articles I have written. The feedback again was not satisfying. He mentioned that he disagreed on some of my points though he could not remember them. My first reaction: I was disappointed. Subsequently, I was reminded on the quote above. That reminded me that I should have embraced disagreement. The disagreement proves that my “apprentice” is not useless. And I should be grateful that he can express his disagreement.

So here are some lessons on disagreement I would like to share:
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When it comes to relationship, limitation “sells”

Does limitation “sell”?

This is the last article on this “Limitation & Advantages” series (check the previous articles at the bottom of the article). This time I’m going to share more about how limitation can “sell”.

Nowadays, selling is too much associated with things related to money; somehow “selling” is associated with an action of taking money from the other person. I’d like to introduce a better word that I found more accurate to be associated with “selling”, it’s called “relationship“.

In a relationship, we’re all selling. Lovers sell their rights to love and to be loved. Friends sell their time to care and help one another. Mentors sell their influence, while mentees sell their potential to be nurtured. Salaried employees sell their time, energy and intellectual property to the company they worked for. Bosses sell their company and vision to their staff. Entrepreneurs undoubtedly sell their products and services in the marketplace, while customers sell their money for the service and products they need. We’re basically selling whenever we deal with at least one person.

Selling does not have to include money; selling without money is called giving.
Selling is not all about our benefit as well, it is also about the others’ benefit.

The only nice thing about being imperfect is the joy it brings to others.

Doug Larson

The first question comes to my mind when I’m reading the quote, “Why does it bring joy to others?” My next thought: “Is it the joy of taking advantage of the others’ imperfection?” A narrow-minded person will think that others’ imperfection is an advantage; imperfection of others will make them looks better, or maybe a way to manipulate, deceive or win over the person. Yes, it is a sort of joy that others’ imperfection can bring for us, but it is a joy for a wrong reason, and hardly people will be really happy and successful with that kind of attitude, jealous and deceitful.

How does our imperfection become a joy for others, then? Here are the answers I found from various sources…

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Dating Introvert: Eight ways to become an attractive woman

I’ve done with the men’s part and now I’m getting into the women’s part. What you need to do in getting a date?

Okay, it is not as if I am promoting girls to be aggressive, taking the first step, asking guys out, and so on. I am not against that, it’s only that some guys will be turned off by all that. You will be seen as an aggressive woman, and men, who are normally having a bigger ego, will be trying to run away from you.

Girls, what you need to do is being an attractive person. This is a proactive step you can take. Yup, beauty and size does matter for guys, but it is actually more than that.

I will prove my point with the following points from Bo Sanchez’s book, How to find your one true love. This article will give you few of the insights from his book on finding your one true love. His ministry in Philippine has helped many men and women in their love and relationship life. You can find his website here and you can also buy the e-book from there.

There are 8 points I want to share in this article, inspired by Bo’s book, the 8 ways how you women can become attractive to men…

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Dating Introvert: Men’s not-to-do list in getting a date

How was your Valentine day last week?
Do you manage to have a date, or do you spend the night alone?

I have made mistakes… I realized after 25^th years of my alone (and sometimes lonely) Valentine day. I have no experience in dating. You may wonder… what can you learn about dating from someone who has never dated before?

It’s the mistakes! This article will share with you insights that open my eyes, things that you should avoid in getting your date. That is the not-to-do list of finding your date.

More importantly, these points are not for you to get any date, not for you to turn any women to be your date; this is about finding the right one for you, not the perfect one (because no one is perfect) but your real true love.

Here it is, the 9 things not to do to get your true love…

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