What is your motivation?

What is your motivation in life?

I read Abraham Maslow’s hierarchy of needs on Wikipedia while preparing for my last message, “When it comes to relationship, limitation sells“. There is one statement that caught my attention there…

Once an individual has moved upwards to the next level, needs in the lower level will no longer be prioritized.

One day I was sharing my new hobby to one of my friend. I shared my enthusiasm on blogging to him. And then I shared how I got to know many people through my blog. His reply is not as what I expected, it was a critical statement. In summary, he said that I will not find satisfaction there, as I will not know the people who I am relating to with my blog.

I believe many people has negative impression on befriending a person over the web, first reason is the vulnerability for not knowing who is the other person, and the second one is the lack of return, it seems impossible for the other person in helping/loving you back. These reasons are valid reasons, and that made me wonder for quite a while, “what if he is right?”, “what if nobody will help me because I no longer have any friend that is next to me?”, “what if one time all I have is only friends contactable by emails?”

His statement bugged me for quite a while, until one day I came to realization on how selfish that motive is. If the thing that takes me away from my passion in blogging is the fear of not having friends, then that will be a very selfish ambition!

Reflecting on my life, I got more understanding on how my motivation has changed over the past two years. The path that leads me to blogging, how I take a step over another step following the Maslow’s hierarchy of needs…

The search for belonging

I was very possessive regarding friends, it got me jealous when a friend is sharing his problem to another friend. Replacing my family here, I was very dependent and put highly expectation on my church small group leader. I also often disappointed when a friend’s attitude changed after he/she got a boy/girlfriend. The realization of the change needed happens on the third quarter of the year 2006. I lost many of my good friends on that period, some are moving overseas, some are attached to a girlfriend. It got me depressed as my need back then was very much on friendship.

The search for esteem

I was sharing before how year 2007 is a year of change (check out “The world where people are sharing“). Most if not all, the changes are the result of the new search I am focusing on. That is the search for confidence and achievement. I moved to a new job as my previous job did not give me a sense of achievement at all. On that period, I also took part in network marketing. The reason back then was to challenge myself, to change my perception on myself that I can sell. Those are my search for confidence, self-esteem and achievement.

The search for self-actualization

Self-actualization - a concept Maslow attributed to Kurt Goldstein, one of his mentors - is the instinctual need of humans to make the most of their abilities and to strive to be the best they can. Working toward fulfilling our potential, toward becoming all that we are capable of becoming.

Wikipedia

I was not doing well with my network marketing. I stopped doing it half-way as I could not enjoy doing it. It stretched me too much, it is beyond my ability right now and many of the selling principles are against my conscience. In the process I learned many things, but this did not satisfy me, I was looking for something more that I can enjoy doing it. That was the time I am inspired to blog, from a friend called Darryl. He blogged on things that he has learned instead of his experience, and that inspired me to do the same. That was the time that I find blogging as a channel for my self-actualization, looking forward to fulfill my potential and work on my talents.

The search for self-transcendence

This is one level above the self-actualization level. It is not stated clearly in the Wikipedia page, but this is the one that Maslow added before he died. It was called self-transcendence. I was introduced to this concept by Robin Sharma. It means more than just expressing yourself. It is a purpose that is beyond yourself, even something that you are willing to die for that.

A man who won’t die for something is not fit to live.

Martin Luther King, Jr.

While researching into this topic, I came across to a CBN interview with Paul David Tripp, the author of the book Quest for More. The book is more about spirituality and christianity, but there is something worth reading there. The book challenges the reader to live beyond the kingdom of self, beyond the world of “I, Me, and Mine”, and move towards the pursuit of a greater purpose, which is mentioned there as the kingdom of God. In the interview, he stated some of the traps that obstructed us from our paths to self-transcendence as follows:

Our path is always obstructed by the little kingdom agenda of personal comfort, position, power, acceptance, pleasure, possessions, etc. When my heart is ruled by these things, I do not end up with much more; I am left with much less.

Paul David Tripp

Robin Sharma also stated that a bigger purpose, vision that is bigger than yourself will also become a driving force in our life. He took an example of his life, how he wanted to become a better person so that eventually he can make a big impact in the people around him.

We all need to know that we are not walking on the planet in vain; we all need to know that as we are going through our days, we are making an impact.

Robin Sharma

I could not say that I have reached this level. I will not die for this blog or whatever else I am doing. But I keep on reminding myself of the bigger vision while I am writing and maintaining this blog. The statement “Helping introverts to be successful” in my tag line is also a way to remind myself of this vision.

My next insight will discuss what are the symptoms of living for self-actualization and self-transcendence. Please keep updated by subscribing via email or RSS in the box below.

Now it is your turn, what motivates you? Please do share with us in the comments.

For your success,
Robert

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