Comments on: Dating Introvert: Men’s not-to-do list in getting a date

By: spencer

spencer — Sun, 18 Dec 2011 22:29:04 +0000

“Do not become another person” hardly belongs in a list full of suggestions to change one’s personality and behavior to essentially imitate an extrovert.

Also – if a woman requires this, she is shallow and not worth pursuit.

By: Son Goku

Son Goku — Tue, 02 Aug 2011 22:55:29 +0000

I’m with Phil on this one. A lot of this advice is the same rhetoric you find in seduction community circles. Slogans like “Be more Alpha”, or “Get yourself out there.”, “Agressive, Agressive, Agressive!”, “Women love confidence” ect. This is why my mantra about the dating game is the same as in the movie Wargames: “The only winning move is not to play.”
And Sherri, you admit that women have come far in 30 years. How far is that if they still expect men to do the asking 100% of the time. You can’t have it both ways. Now I know why so many American men choose not to date American women.

By: timi

timi — Fri, 20 May 2011 01:53:43 +0000

Don’t do chatting for long periods until you meet your partner physically; avoid discussing unnecessary things. Don’t talk about the things in which the other person is not interested.

By: Moon Walker

Moon Walker — Tue, 24 Nov 2009 20:41:58 +0000

I went out on a date recently with an introvert woman, who would talk very little. Now, I’m myself an introvert, but have a dual personality. My real personality is that of an introvert, a thinker and reflector, but my external personality is that of an extrovert when I choose to be one. So on this date, I was imitating people and cracking jokes, even though she was only smiling at them, not laughing.

Eventually, I asked her what the issue was with the other previous suitors, and she said that most of them were quite boring. I then asked her if she found me boring, and she said no.

There will be another date after this, and we’ll take it further from there.

The point I’m trying to make is that introverts best get along with one another, although one of the two individuals involved has to act like an extrovert in order to keep the conversation going. Thought I’d share my two cents on this issue.

By: filipina women

filipina women — Wed, 10 Jun 2009 06:18:10 +0000

this is a helping tip to all the guys out there who wants to go to a date that they really want and the donts are specific…

By: Jean Browman--Cheeerful Monk

Jean Browman--Cheeerful Monk — Fri, 29 Aug 2008 18:30:24 +0000

Phil,
Amen to that! See my comment above.

By: Phil Fine

Phil Fine — Fri, 29 Aug 2008 14:54:42 +0000

I hate to say this, Robbie ol’ boy, but your suggestions sound no different from those found in the run-of-the-mill dating guides put out by the likes of Robert A. Wray & Co. (He goes so far as
to encourage men to learn to play the guitar in order to woo women).

I think that in the dating game (some game!)introverts can best help themselves by linking up with other introverts — preferably of the same background and IQ level. Joining Mensa is one option, joining a book club is another. (And IQ is important. Hertstein & Murray, in their book “The Bell Curve,” argue that people who marry tend to be within a few IQ points of one another).

And, as for telling intellectuals that they shouldn’t be analytical, that’s ridiculous! A person is who he is. If he’s analytical, then he needs to find a woman who’s analytical. Ditto if he’s an intellectual, or a scientist or whatever.

A lot of these self-help dating gurus in the U.S. would do well to read Richard Hofstedter’s “Anti-intellectualism in American Life.” Although this might not get them a date, it would open their eyes to the stupidity that characterizes so much of the self-help business in the U.S.!

By: Robert A.

Robert A. — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 22:15:50 +0000

Hi Alex, thanks a lot for your encouragement!
Wish you all the best with your improvement too!
Cheers,
Robert

By: Alex Kay

Alex Kay — Wed, 27 Feb 2008 18:12:31 +0000

This is all really great advice Robert, nice to see!

Thanks so much for the reference, it’s really appreciated mate. And good luck with your improvement, I’m sure you’re going to get far!

Alex

By: Dating introvert: Eight ways to become an attractive woman : Reason-4-Smile Weblog

Tue, 26 Feb 2008 16:09:11 +0000

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