How to avoid busyness #3: The Competitor
Honestly, what are you trying to win in life? Do you think life is a racing, a competition or a contest? Do you always compare yourself with others? Do you always say I’m not outspoken enough, I’m not smart enough, or I’m not beautiful enough.
Being busy sometimes deals a lot when we are comparing with other people, striving to be the best, being somebody that we do not even like to do, just for the sake our own ego of pride and admiration from others. We live in the world where each individual strive for being the best, capable of doing anything, popular in many ways, rich and admired by many fans, yet also have lots of friends that be with us. No wonder we felt challenged to keep on busy to fight for the best.
The question: shall we strive to be the best?
I’m reading a book from Jack Welch right now, titled “Winning”. Inside the book, he shows us the importance of focus in mission and values in a business life, he continues on giving a living example of a company called Enron…
Enron’s new mission meant it focused first on trading energy and then on trading anything and everything. That change was probably pretty exciting at the time, but obviously no one stopped to figure out and explicitly broadcast what values and corresponding behaviors would support such a heady goal… And it was in that context —of no context— that Enron’s collapse occured.
Enron pursuing to be sell anything and everything without the capabilities to do that! That made them collapse. It’s not only true in a business life, but also in our individual life…
1. Be what you are!
A quote that inspire me, I have shared few days back on the first step to change…
Be what you are.
This is the first step toward becoming better than you are.
–Julius Charles Hare
2. Be comfortable with who you are!
The title of the message I recently listened from Joel Osteen. Often, I feel intimidated by being not outspoken enough, or not having as many friends as others. Similarly, we often feel intimidated, envy and challenged to become another person, having skills that they have, doing what they can, having as many friends as them, etc.
A story that touches me, story of King Saul, king of Israel and David, a young fellow that God has chosen to be the successor of King Saul. After David managed to kill Goliath, a giant that threaten the Israelites, the Israelites sang songs to praise David over Saul. They sang how David kills 10,000 while Saul only kills 1000.
What are we going to do if we are King Saul?
- Being jealous, threatened that his position is to be taken over by David, planning to kill David and get rid of him, so that we still become the best in the kingdom?
- Pursuing the skills that David has, forgetting about being the king and focusing to become a warrior that able to kill not only 1000 people, but 10,000 people?
- Or, should we still focus on what responsibility we have right now, still doing the best we can be as a king and partner with David to win the battle we have to face?
Sadly, Saul chose the first option, consumed by the jealousy and try to kill David, and as the result, he is removed from his throne as the king of Israel.
Being comfortable of who you are involves a lot by not being jealous! Tina Su wrote an article of 9 ways to overcome jealousy that I find it very good. Some of the ways she mentioned is finding your strength and stop comparing! These are the ways you can be comfortable of who you are, not intimidated by others and even enjoy your blunders!
3. Be the best of who you are!
To answer the first question being asked above, YES, we are striving to be the best, but not the best compared to the others, it’s the best of what we can be, compare yourself with your own potential, have you become the best that you can be? have you taken the right decision that you can make today? Take our everyday life challenges as opportunity to grow, simply a small step of growing everyday is a way to become the best of you are!
Even if you’re not a 10,000 people-crusher as David, be the best of 1,000 people-crusher, not 900, 950, or even 999. Similarly, even if you’re not a natural extrovert, be the best introvert that you can be! Even if you’re not a lighthouse that beam to show the light to a big ship, you still can be the most transparent lantern that can show the light to a group of people.
You don’t have to be busy trying to become anybody else, you are unique, enjoy and maximize your uniqueness!